There wasn't 1000 matches, and it was in the afternoon, but still, here goes:
TV SHOW 1:
#1 Detroit Funk City defeated Thing #1 and Thing #2 by pinfall.
DFC came into the studio saying they were never letting the Tag Belts go. Funkmaster passed an ABA basketball behind his back to the Demon in the ring, who spun it on his fingers, and then knocked down Thing #1 with a hard chest pass. The match ensued with DFC winning easily.
#3 TXW Youtube TV Title #1 Contender Match
Dwayne Windham defeated Dr. Cancer and Bobby Blassie
Funkmaster V came to the ring with the TXW Tag Belt and mocked Bobby Blassie with it until Blassie chased him out of the studio, eliminating himself. Dwayne Windham defeated Dr. Cancer with a Flatliner.
#4 Dave Pillman defeated Dante Knight via pinfall.
#5 Shane Daniels defeated Zack Dillon by Cattle Mutilation for a submission win.
TV SHOW 2:
TXW Tag Team Champions The Bob Squad came out first. Bobby Blassie said that they wanted Detroit Funk City to return the belts to their proper owners. Bob O Mac said all he wanted was for his wife, Beth O Funk, to start acting normal again and to quit managing DFC.
#1 TXW Tag Team Title Match
The Bob Squad defeated Thing #1 and Thing #2 via pinfall
#2 Ruff Cutt defeated Dante Knight and Zack Dillon via submission.
Jody Rivers had a briefcase with him, and Mike Powers said that he had a surprise in it. Jody Rivers said that TXW is fond of briefcases, and that what is inside will rock TXW to its core.
TXW Youtube TV Title #1 Contender Match
#3 Chris Cameron defeated Barry Allen via pinfall.
#4 Funkmaster V w/ Beth O Funk defeated Wicked Truth by submission.
TV SHOW 3:
#1 Dwayne Windham defeated Funkmaster V w/ Beth O Funk by count out
Funkmaster V kept taking sips from his "PIMP CUP" throughout the match, but after Dwayne smashed it to bits, Funkmaster lost his composure. Funkmaster ducked a super kick and left the ring to cut a promo. Dwayne pounced on Funkmaster from the ring apron after the interview, with Funkmaster reportedly getting a shard of PIMP CUP stuck in his rear end.
US Tag Team Championship
#2 Ruff Cutt defeated Thing 1 and Thing 2
Ruff Cutt said that their surprise was that someone locally put up $10,000 for them to be in a tag team tournament in Memphis, and that they came back as the winners of the tournament. They now don't care who the Tag Champs are, they will run through whoever and prove that they have the #1 belts in TXW.
#3 The Demon demolished The Headstrong Zodiacs (Dr. Cancer & Sir Virgo) via a pinfall after a simultaneous double chokeslam.
#4 Shane Daniels defeated Barry Allen (The Blonde Bombshell Version) via pinfall
TXW Youtube TV #1 Contender Match
#5 Maskerade defeated Dave Pillman by DQ. Dave Pillman did not care about winning the match, he only cared about revenge. Pillman was DQ'd after he delivered a Kendo Stick shot to Maskerade's head for giving him a concussion on the last TXW show.
TV SHOW 4:
US TAG TEAM TITLE MATCH
#1 Ruff Cutt defeated Chris Cameron and Shane Daniels by pinfall
#2 Bobbie Blassie defeated The Headstrong Zodiacs (Dr. Cancer & Sir Virgo) by submission (Double Single Leg Crab~ is that an oxy moron?)
#3 Dwayne Windham defeated Thing #1 by pinfall
#4 Dave Pillman defeated Barry Allen by pinfal
#5 Dante Knight and Zack Dillon defeated Detroit Funk City w/ Beth O Funk by pinfall
The Bob Squad showed up, with Blassie yelling at the Demon and Bob O Mac talking to his wife. DFC was distracted, and Zack and Dante rolled up the fake tag team champions for the 1-2-3! The crowd went nuts, and after a brief melee, DFC ran out of the studio with the crowd chanting "Bob Squad!"
